strangeness

It's been an interesting day for me.

Starting with last night, here's the interesting:

-My neighbor, who is 18 years old (5 years younger than me), and has always been my like my little brother said something that really bugged me last night. Growing up, he ADORED me, and I loved having him as a tag along. He's selling cookie dough for his track team and came over so I could order some. He stopped to look at the pictures on my parents' fridge. There are a handful of some of my more flattering high school pictures up there. As he's leaving my house, he says "you used to be so good looking, but you've started to let yourself go a little."

Now I know he was just messing with me and joking with me, but at the same time, why would you say something like that if it weren't partially true. Ya know?
Yeah, I was in my work clothes after closing a show last night and doing strike after.
Yeah, we had to scrub out the backstage kitchen and fridge during strike, so I was extra grimy.
Yeah, I rolled out of bed yesterday and went straight to work without showering, so my hair wasn't in peak-condition.
And yeah, I've gained weight since high school.
And yes, I don't usually get down on myself, but this really bugged me for some reason. Boo.

-I had a follow up appointment with my new doctor from the asthma test I had last week. I miss my old family doctor. This woman actually got shitty with me when I didn't perfectly follow her instructions before my test because hers were unclear to begin with and were different from the instructions the hospital gave me when they called to talk to me about my appointment. I'm the first one to admit when I've messed up, but that wasn't my fault.

This is the same doctor whose office sent me to get 2 tests done and didn't send me with the appropriate paperwork, so I had to jump through tons of bureaucratic hoops in order to get them done properly.

Also, my old doctor, no matter what the illness or issue was, was absolutely so kind and helpful. He never ONCE made me feel judged or like a terrible person. Not when we talked about my weight and diet, not when we talked about my sex life, not when we talked about my mental stability. Today? This woman? Made me feel judged. That's not ok, or fun.

-I did my taxes 'on my own' for the first time today. My parents have always just done them for me in the past because I was up at school, and all of my paperwork/forms came to the house. Plus the both file taxes for a living, so no big deal for them to do my measly taxes. But I say 'on my own' rather than on my own because every 5 minutes I was calling out a question. After a while, because it was funny, I started asking them retarded questions like: Did I inherit a farm in 2008? Do I earn any income from a farm (or a farm in a foreign country) in 2008? Did I earn any income from a retirement fund in 2008? Am I blind or a senior citizen?

That last part was fun. The rest of it...not so much. Although I should be getting like $500 back! That is DEFINITELY fun.

bodily failure

Dear Body,

Please stop hating me and battling against yourself. I am not very pleased that a day and a half after we found out you had a temporary asthma like problem as well as an inflamed chest joint, as well as prescribed remedies for both, you also began to exhibit the worst head and chest cold symptoms ever. I would really appreciate it if you would get over yourself and help me out here.

Signed,
Me

PS. Thank you for at least sabotaging me now instead of waiting until my Birthday on Monday or tech at the end of next week.

-----------------------

One of the websites I read daily, had this as their quote of the day yesterday. I find it quite appropriate for me.

"If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door." Paul Beatty

wood knocking

Remember that time when I raved over how lucky and grateful I am do be doing what I'm doing right now?

Yeah...I forgot to KNOCK ON WOOD after I wrote that.

No, I didn't lose my job. But within a week or so of writing that post, a plethora of really unpleasant job/my future related things happened. These include (but are not limited to) being summoned for FEDERAL jury duty (not exactly work related, I realize, but it can affect my prospects of getting summer employment), having a young actor have a meltdown backstage during a performance, and dealing with some other quite unpleasant musings.

But in good news (no, I haven't learned my lesson), I had a (phone) job interview this week for summer work that went pretty well. Keep your fingers crossed for me!

Oh yeah...and the obligatory *KNOCK ON WOOD*

Add To The List Of Things I...

LOVE:

-Chuck. What? A NEW tv show for me to DVR and watch obsessively? Fine by me. At least it's not on Thursday nights.
-Did I mention that that phase I go through every few months where I'm a book-a-holic came back in May and is STICKING this time?
-Mom coming home from vacation in Florida and bringing me stuff. Especially the new makeup that I desperately needed but didn't have the money for.
-Getting a haircut on Thursday.
-Secret Santa.
-Crossword Puzzles.
-Finding my missing DVD of Elf that I've been dying to watch since Thanksgiving.
-Spaghetti made with love by my dad.
-Being able to finally go to sleep NOT shivering so much it hurts because my mom keeps our house at 67*...which means the upstairs where we sleep is about 64* because mom was on vacation.


more animals

DO NOT LOVE:

-The fact that now that my mom is home, I have to go back to falling asleep freezing my ass off.
-Drawing my boss' boss' boss (also, my BIG boss) at The Theatre's name in Secret Santa and being TOTALLY intimidated by figuring out what to get her. No pressure.
-RAIN.
-Losing my copy of one of my all time favorite books (The Time Traveller's Wife) when I was planning on reading it again.
-Walking from the parking garage to work in POURING RAIN.
-Did I mention my cold house?

oh, you know, the usual

Again, I sing the praises of Zappos.com. Seriously, if you've never used them, then do it. Now. Best.Place.On.Earth. I tried another site, zbsports.com, to order the same shoes because they were cheaper on there, but believe me, the $9 I woulda saved was NOT WORTH IT.

Tech is...well, it's tech. It went pretty well, although we haven't actually finished teching the show (but to no fault of stage management and the PAs :) ). Three 13 hour days in a row was rough. Today's my day off, and then the rest of the week will be pretty rough, but hopefully not as rough as this weekend.

I got some tragic news this weekend...on Thursday I got a facebook message from a girl at SMC who lived in my hall first year, and who I knew relatively well. She and I share a very good mutual friends. Well, she told me that this friend of ours', one of my closest friends at SMC, I'd say, mother passed away. I'm still completely in shock, and I cannot even begin to imagine how she must be feeling. I'm totally heartbroken for her and her family. I know how close and tight knit they were (very similar to me and mine). If you're the praying type, please send some extra prayers towards Buffalo, NY this week.

it costs HOW much??

Getting your purse and keys stolen is expensive:

-Dad changed the locks on the house (although it needed to be done for other reasons).

-I went to the DMV to get a new license. When asked if my weight or height had changed, I decided to be honest (mostly) and let them know my weight had gone up. The weight on there was from when I was 15 and I fibbed a little then. Although, what respectable woman doesn't take a few pounds off? Well I learned towards the end of the experience at the DMV that had I not been honest, the replacement license would have been free, but because I changed my weight, I had to pay $10. I call them on bullshit on that one.

-Dad finally called our storage unit to find out how to get into our unit, since the key was on my keys. It costs $25 and we have to buy a new lock. That's not a lot, but still, it's something.

-My mom had been harping me to see how much it cost to change the locks on my car since they have my car keys and my address. I called today. $500. And while that's cheaper than replacing a stolen car, that's a LOT of money.

Welcome to the adult world, Deeter.

In other news, I will be signing up for NetFlix in the next few days. If you have any input on which plan I should get, I'd love to hear it!

Seriously???

I had started a really creative and funny post as a letter to the person who stole my purse last night as my blog post about it, but then my mom called to tell me he DID use my debit card, so now I'm even MORE pissed and can't think creatively...

So last night, Smiley and I hung out. We went to McAlister's to pick up some food to go, and then we drove down to Holliday Park to have a mini picnic. It was pretty sweet...until we got back to his car. We were gone for 55 minutes exactly (as I can tell by phone calls made). In those 55 minutes, someone managed to break into his car (thankfully without busting out any windows) and steal my purse. They didn't take anything else, just my purse.

At first, I was just thinking "well fuck, this sucks, I'll call my parents, have my mom transfer my $$ to her bank account it's not a HUGE deal." Then, after having to call my house 3 times to get one of my parents to answer, while talking to my mom, I realized that it was the purse that my Grandma Deeter made for my mom when my mom and dad were dating in college (so 25 years ago). My mom gave it to me last summer, and it's one of the 3 purses I use all the time. It was adorable--crocheted (although Melissa and Michaela used the word macromayed (that's a phonetic spellin) when they saw it) and just big enough for a wallet, keys, phone, and bottle of water to fit in snugly. And its handles were 2 wooden rings instead of straps. So not only did I lose an adorable purse, but it was made by my grandmother who died while I was studying abroad, who I was the closest with, who I still miss terribly and think about a few times a week, and who meant the most to me. Come on purse stealing ass wipe, why couldn't you have taken the money and threw the purse on the ground???

What was in the purse that got stolen? Well, luckily on Saturday night when my family and our neighbors went to the theatre to see a show (the theatre I'll be working at starting in August :) ), I carried a tiny purse and took my driver's license, my SMC ID, and my debit card out of my brand new Le Sport Sac wallet from NYC and put them in a tiny card holder, and that's all I had with me wallet wise. There would have been a lot of stuff in that big wallet had it been taken-insurance card, AAA card, voters' reg card, credit card, lots of receipts, etc.

So they got my license, my debit card, and an SMC ID-luckily for me, I lost and found my ID so much while at SMC that I have 2 extras lying around the house. Some tampons, I hope they grossed him out. Yes, I'm assuming it's a he, because any woman that would do that knows how important a purse is to a lady and probably would have just taken the money and the wallet, no? Also my powder compact-and I wear Yves Saint Laurent makeup, so that will be expensive to replace, but it's not as big of a deal cuz, honestly, how often do I wear makeup?

Oh, and the clincher in all of this??? My car/house keys, that included the only key to my family's storage unit, like 10 tags for grocery stores etc, a hand made leather key chain I bought in Rome, the only clicker to my car, and probably something else. Of course I wasn't going to bring my keys, cuz I knew my parents would leave the door unlocked and that we wouldn't be late coming home, but Smiley told me I should always carry my keys, so I took them. Not that I blame him at all. Last night I think he was more upset than I was, which was really sweet. He told me that when I'm with him, it's his responsibility to make sure I'm ok, etc etc. So I'm not mad at him at all, and I'd rather it happen with him than with some one who would have freaked out and made me freak out.

So anyways, all that got stolen, plus, you know, the family heirloom purse, and what does that mean? Well I called my dad right away. My mom got on the computer to transfer my money to her bank account, and then called the bank to report the theft and cancel the card-having a mom who's a VP at your bank has it's perks. Unfortunately my address is on my driver's license, and they have my keys, so that could potentially mean them coming to my house and breaking into the house or stealing my car...yikes. Luckily it's just the front door key, so we can change that lock, and we have a dead bolt and an alarm system. Not to mention 2 dogs who bark at everything and one of them is kind of large and has a terrifying bark. My mom thinks I should look into seeing how much it costs to get the lock/ignition on my car changed. That might be a bit over the top, but we're all being really careful/paranoid about locking the door at our house and turning the alarm on 24/7 now.

Plus I have to go get a new license. Dad came home "not feeling well" today, so he helped my find my social security card, because apparently I need to prove that the ssn associated with my license is mine. I also have a passport, thank you Roma 06, a voter's reg card, 2 SMC ID's, an insurance card, and an international student ID, so they have to believe it's me. I was supposed to help my aunt today, getting her house ready to sell (painting etc), but she told me to take care of my license and what not and we'd work tomorrow. Then I learned that the DMV's are not open on Monday's in Indiana. Thank you jerk off purse snatcher for fucking that up too.

I just don't understand what goes through the mind of a person that does this. I mean, obviously there's no fear of God, because I'm pretty sure not stealing is in the 10 Commandments. Plus no thought to what kind of affect their actions have on other people. Obviously it's naive of me to think there aren't bad people in the world. I guess it's a good thing I believe in Karma. I called the park today to see if it had turned up. It hadn't, but they were very nice and took my name, phone number, and description of purse and said they'd go out and look and call me back right away if they found something. That's nice. It is like the biggest family friendly park in Indy, so safety, etc means a lot to them. Plus the police man who came to file the report last night was nice-he's the one who pointed out that we're lucky they didn't bust in Smiley's windows, which is very true. ALthough it did turn out that he used my debit card at a gas station right away-who knows what else, but I'm surprised it went through, because within 15 minutes of me calling my house, which was exactly 55 minutes after our initial leaving the car, my mom had the card reported and cancelled.

Anyways, needless to say I'm pretty pissed, really upset and emotional, and kind of stressed. ANd I had like 4 other things I wanted to blog about from the last week-baseball games and everything! Balls.

to learn more, go to...... .com

I've done a lot since my last post, and in an effort to save us all some time, I'll just list stuff.

-Moved out of 430 Le Mans Hall. Packed the dad's van, then took 2 hampers and a suitcase to Castle Point to live til the end of the month.
-Began realizing a scene design at the Civic here for Intimate Apparel.
-Had said design be beautiful. I know that's really self-praise-filled and all, but, for reasons you will see in the next item, it's been a rough week and so I'm really proud of myself for getting through this far.
-Had the TD, who is usually a very jovial, nice man fucking EXPLODE at me. Not because of my actions in particular, but I was the outlet, and boy was it terrifying.
-Tonight, said TD tried to make amends in a most awkward way of saying the set looks really nice.
-Officially gotten over the most recent crush I've had.
-After asking a certain person if he'd come see a dress rehearsal for my show (I invited him and everyone else to the real show, but tickets are expensive, and I can bring whomever I want to dress rehearsals for free) and he said "Are you acting in it? No? then just show me pictures." Yeah, douchy, right?
-Officially fallen in love with an older man. Ok, he's not like OLD. He's just older than me. I don't actually know how old he is. I'm guessing 30.
-Bonded with Caroline's devil cat Lola.
-Grilled out TWICE. On daddy deeter's awesome portable grill. He brought it up for us to use between senior week and when I come home next weekend.
-Bought my airline tickets for NYC with Fur. Booked our hostel. Ordered our Yankees tickets.
-Cooked spaghetti. I realize that cooking isn't usually an accomplishment for people. But for me, it's huge. I've never cooked before. And this past week staying at an apartment is my first experience not having a dining hall or being at home where my parents always cook or we eat out.
-Went to a graduation party where I had the best cake ever, played Apples to Apples with some of my fave people, roasted mallows, dipped the roasted mallows in melted chocolate and teddy grahms, and told ghost stories.
-Had tech and first dress for Intimate Apparel.
-Drove home in the worst downpour/storm I've ever experienced. That was tonight. And I thought I was going to die.

something in italian

Today has been full of ups and downs, stresess and reliefs. And as of now, it is mostly reliefs.

Had a big scare that for one reason or another I was less than half way done with my hours for my internship this semester. Yeah, I freaked out when I found that out. Found out today that I'm only 6 hours away from being completed with the hours. *PHEW*

Tonight was first dress. That's always fun. And since it's so beautiful outside, it's ROASTING inside (mostly just Moreau/O'Laughlin). And the fans have to be off in O'L for the show. So, needless to say, it's HOT.

Now if only I could get this Voice and Movement paper started and finished, life would be pretty good.

And it's a weird feeling to have just finished my last first dress at SMC.

that i'd see you again

Today was a depressing day. It started at 4am when I woke up with the serious type of stomach cramps when I accidentally eat something with eggs or milk in it. And again at 6am. Then at 7/7:30am the fire alarm went off AGAIN in Le Mans. Second time in two days. Sickness continued all morning. I had to perform in Voice and Movement today. Voice and Movement is never fun, but it is especially unfun when you are feeling miserable (read: hating your body) and have to perform.

I didn't go to the Civic today cuz of how I was feeling. I slept for a while, then had to go to "Federal Student Loan Exit Counseling". Yeah, that shit is depressing. They told us exactly how much debt we were each in. Actually no, not exactly. The figures they gave us didn't include the interest that had been adding up since we started college. Also, just Federal loans. Private ones not included.

That on top of not having heard back yet on jobs was a REAL bummer.

Then, while at opera rehearsal tonight, I heard girls talking about someone who had gotten food poisoning from the DH. And I thought "hm...it's NEVER this bad when I've eaten something I'm allergic to. Never." And so I drew the conclusion that this sickness is not allergy born, but rather a mild food poisoning. Fuck.

Now I'm watching Remember The Titans and thinking about editing my comp reflection.

ring me on the alexander grahm bell

Man o man has it been an eventful last few days. Here's a partial list of tag lines for stories to be told. If you're interested in any of it, let me know and I'll be happy to excite/bore you with the details:

1. reuniting with a a certain friend
2. almost killing someone
3. sharpie-ing someone's enTIRE leg and arm.
4. fire and flowers
5. almost killing someone
6. 6 shows at the civic, including stellar jokes from myself and my spot op during the last show :)
7. almost killing someone
8. seeing my boyfriend, John Krasinski, in Leatherheads
9. choosing to keep the back up dvd player
10. almost killing someone
11. changed first impressions from snot nosed shits to really fun to talk to
12. almost killing someone
13. closing the show at the civic and people there

and now i sleep.

heroes fall as years go by

So, since my huge.fucking.debbie.downer.post last week, things have been pretty great. Not completely great. But great none the less.

Friday night was the Keenan Revue. It was pretty good. Sarah went with me. It was a good time. Sarah and I have been hanging out more recently. It's been nice cuz she knows exactly what to say to me to make me feel better, and I know that she's right because i know that she knows me.

My dad came up Saturday. We had fun. Ran errands. Ate at BW3s :). Went to the NDvDePaul basketball game. It was weird to be at the game and not be with the basketball band. Saturday night I went to castle point to hang out with some friends after the Revue.

Sunday my dad was just going to leave south bend without seeing me cuz he knew i was going out Saturday night. He called me and his car got broken into while inthe parking garage at
the Marriott downtown. He said that they shattered his driver's side window. At first he thought nothing was stolen (even tho his ipod, gps, my moms gps, and his xm radio were sitting out in plain view). He figured whoever it was got scared away before they could steal anything. He realized on his way home that they stole his radar detector--the cheapest thing out of all of that, ironically. Apparently the Marriott had had this happen before. They vacuumed his car, taped his window (he called to tell me he had a kentucky window), and said that if the hotel's and his insurance wouldnt cover it, that they'd give him 2 free nights for graduation.

Had to start load-in for the dance show on sunday. Had rehearsal for my comp too. Plus watched the superbowl at ays and caroline's. I ended up spending the night cuz when it was time for me to go home, it was snowing like crazy.

Today was mostly good. then it got sucky. I guess my whole reason for posting is to bitch about tonight. Whatever. It wasn't SO bad...it was just one thing after another that kinda upset me. Someone didnt show up for my rehearsal. Then we weren't getting ANYTHING accomplished. I take partial responsibility for this because I allow openness and fun and sillyness most of the time. But it got out of hand. Plus im stressed about my comp anyways. Much more than I let on. Plus people have to miss rehearsals later in the week. grr. Then I realized that the person I always call to cheer me up and to give me some perspective "can't talk to me right now" cuz "shit happened in his world and hes gotta figure it out on his own" or whatever. And that pissed me off even more. Since that really pathetic post last week, I haven't been too bad. I just needed to get that stuff out, and it made it much much easier to deal with. I was able to talk it out with someone i know who really understands me, that helped too. So i havent been thinking about it as much or as upset by it as much. I have finally just accepted that hes being a jerk, and if hes gonna be a jerk, im better off without him in my life til he decides not to be. So I was ok. But tonight I got upset cuz I was upset about something, and couldnt call my bestfriend who was always there for me and helped me deal with that shit. Then I got more upset cuz I started thinking about how stupid this whole fucking situation is. and it was a vicious cycle. (wow the spelling and grammar in this is terrible, sorry). So I came back to my room pissed off and sad as shit. Was obnoxious and emotional and made an idiot of myself to 2 people on aim. Not in a huge way, but I should have just cooled off instead of being all emo or whatever, cuz i hate it when people do that and i hate it when i do that. Plus, I always regret things I say when I say them upset. Grr. So i'm left with thinking about how dumb this whole thing really is (not the comp thing, its perfectly fine to be angry about that), and I'm not as upset anymore. I'm trying to actively make it not my problem.

Wow. I'm a little pathetic.
Tomorrow=Fat Tuesday, Civic, Voice and Movement, no rehearsal, and who knows.

I'll leave you with a pitcute of some sweet stuff I did at the civic last week.